Three Steps.

A year or so ago, I did an online James study led by Mark Hall from Casting Crowns. It was such an awesome study that put a lot of things into perspective for me and to this day- I still dwell on it!
I have had a lot on my heart lately concerning people and their views on Christianity. I am currently reading 3 books (yes, at once!) and each are very straight forward and are just what I need. I am tired of watered down, sugar coated, I'm okay-you're okay-we're all okay books and sayings. In my intentional, desperate pursuit of Jesus, a part of a video from the James study came into my mind, so I pulled out my notes and looked up the video and re-learned what it was talking about!
So allow me to lead you through these 3 steps to get you back to where God calls you to be. 
"So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. ⁸ Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world. ⁹ Let there be tears for what you have done. Let there be sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy. ¹⁰ Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor." James 4:7-10
Lets break this down.
Step 1: Submit yourselves to God.
-Do you submit everything to Him in your life? Your choices, your words, your friends, your feelings, your goals, your dreams?? "Lord, is this what You want for me?"
Step 2: Resist the Devil and he will flee from you.
-Are there areas in your life where you are openly-yet obliviously inviting sin into your life? T.V. Shows, Movies, people,going certain places, habits? Not just resisting temptation, but resisting putting ourselves in positions where we know things could go wrong. Understand your weaknesses! 
Step 3: Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.
-Spend time in His Word. Spend time with His people-Go to Church! (it doesn't have to be my church-pray about where God wants you to go (Submit to Him!!) I was telling my sister a few weeks ago, We are like plants and God is the sun. If we aren't out soaking up everything He has for us and we're sitting somewhere in a closet- then we aren't growing in Him! Hebrew 10:25 says "Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching." Forget what the World tells you and listen to the living Word of God! We need each other. We need fellowship! Get in the Word. Spend time in His presence!


Father God, Help me to submit all of my self to you in full surrender so that I stay in Your will and grow in Your amazing Presence. I love You. Amen.

Rest

As I woke up this morning, I rolled over to my side, with my eyes still closed, and whispered, "Lord, this is the day that you have made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.". The sun immediately filtered through my window and lit up my room, reassuring me of God's almighty presence. I love when that happens. I desperately needed it today.. Well everyday actually.
After having an intense "cry out to Jesus" last night, I am resting in His promises of peace.
"Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30 NLT)
My prayers are that I completely surrender everything that I think I should need and trust in Him who knows everything that I do need, and His provision for those needs being met. I am created for His purpose and I have to trust that fully submitting to Him is the only way.

Turning frustration into Blessing

I was in my kitchen, cooking the latest recipe that I had discovered on Pinterest, when I decided that it was time to see what my two year old was doing. As I rounded the corner of the couch, I found her surrounded by the contents of my bible bag. My bible was in her lap and a pen was in her hand. I immediately took them both away and told her, "you can't color in Mama's bible, baby.". Even though I didn't raise my voice, she knew she was in the wrong and collapsed to the side and her little bottom lip start quivering. Instantly, the Lord convicted me. "don't you write in your Bible?? Can you imagine what its going to be like when she is grown and you come across those few tiny scribbles? How you will miss this stage?" so I immediately scooped her back up into my arms and opened my bible and showed her that little piece of art and said, "this is pretty, Molli. Mommy loves it!" ((note: this is a one time thing, I will keep my bags put away from now on))
Back to my story, her little tear-filled blue eyes looked up at me and she pointed to the scribbles and said, "uh oh! Color!!" and I explained that it's okay, she isn't in trouble. She was so happy that mommy wasn't mad at her. Many, many years from now, I'm going to see her scribbles and remember her big, concerned, blue eyes and think of how I nurtured her heart that day. I chose grace instead of wrath and was blessed from it.
Aren't you glad the Lord chooses grace over wrath for you?? I sure am.

Here I am!!

I woke up this morning to Beth Moore preaching on my tv. And she was talking about the time she traveled to Angola with her husband and their stay at a very third world looking motel. She talked about her journey down the winding stairs to the bathroom near the lobby that had people in it who did not speak English. While she was in the bathroom, a blackout occurred. She was terrified. She slowly made her way out into the lobby where it was also pitch black and all she could hear were whispers in another language. She was now shaking with fear. Then, she heard a man's heavy footsteps drawing near to her and all she could do was politely whimper, "here I am! I'm just right over here!!". Much to her surprise, it was her husband coming to save her. She held her hands out crying, "I'm right here!! Get me!!" and he rescued her.
How awesome is God to rescue us when we are standing in pitch darkness, reaching out for Him! He is so faithful. His love endures forever!
The very same God that sees my heart and knows my words before they're even on my tongue.. Yet, he still loves me! Satan is not going to steal my joy! He comes to steal, kill, and destroy. Jesus comes to give life! Folks, there is peace in his presence and I crave it!
Blessings to you all on this beautiful day that He has made!

Already There

I feel like I have been walking in a fog the past two weeks. So much going on in my heart and mind. Trials and Tribulations from almost every single corner of my life and I am mentally exhuasted from it all. My human heart wants to go all "fire and brimstone" on the world.. But my "Jesus heart" tells me Matthew 5:44 " But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you". Easier said than done, huh, when you feel as though you have done your part to mend. James very specifically says "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,^[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³ because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. ⁴ Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."
I love that verse. It has been helpful in a variety of troubles in my Christian life. I love Jesus so much and I am so thankful to know that He is already standing at the end of my life looking back saying, ''hey! Yeah, this week, this month, maybe even this year you'll have trouble and heartbreak. But, remember, I am already at the end of this- and you're going to get through this with me!"
In my time of need, I came across a video devotional about this very topic! And listened to this quote from Mark Lowery:
 "Has it ever occurred to you that nothing has ever occurred to God?"
Simple as that. He knows everything about everything and he has ALWAYS known everything about everything.
HE is my joy.

"oh, soweeee"

As Molli sat on her little Elmo potty and fiddled around, I grew impatient with her for playing with the toilet lid. I repeatedly told her to quit messing with it until I finally raised my voice at her and said "Molli, stop it."
Her heart was broken.
As she cried and told me how sad she was, she said, "I sowee" (I'm sorry)
My heart melts every time I hear those little words- whether she is crying them or not! My heart instantly forgives her.
These are the things that went through my mind as I hugged her on that little Elmo potty and then I thought to myself, "wow. I wonder if that is how the Lord is with his disobedient children that He loves so much. Does His heart melt when his babies surrender to him and say they're sorry?" I bet so.

Spilling my Heart Out..

I'm not even sure where to begin or what to even title this post. I just know that this is on my heart so heavily! So.. I'm going to just pour my heart out.
A few weeks ago, I read Max Lucado's It's Not About Me. (I know that I have already blogged about that.. But please bear with me!) In the chapter titled "My struggles are about Him", Max talked about John 9:1-5
"As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?" "Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him. As long as it is day, we must do the works of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work. While I am in the world, I am the light of the world." (John 9:1-5 NIV)"
That hit me like a ton of bricks. (or so I thought)
WELL, this week, my mother and I were discussing Molli and her progress that she has made. My mom said something along the lines of, "I just don't understand why babies are born this way. I mean, why even make them that way at all? I just don't understand it." and I was quick to share with her John 9:1-5. I actually had my bible out in my lap in the car while she was driving us to my sister's house and I read that to her. Then, as I read "..so that the works of God might be displayed in him" a tidal wave of His spirit rushed over me and I saw (in my mind) a video of Molli walking in her walker with her therapist. Then I exclaimed to my mother, "so that the works of God might be displayed in him!!! Look at Molli! When people see her standing and walking in that video, they see a MIRACLE from GOD!! He does not think like us! I, personally, think it is an awesome honor for Molli to be such a vessel!" and she agreed. My point is, people all over this country have seen pictures of her and have seen the videos that I have posted and seen what miracles God has done! How can we look at her and not see Him??
Today, during church, our Sunday school lesson and sermon were out of Psalm 139 because it is Sanctity of Human Life Sunday. I was given this verse before Molli was born. She has this verse hanging in her room. This is my "Molli verse"! We were shown a presentation from Hope Pregnancy Center to provide awareness of the ministry and of the devastating facts of abortions done each year in the U.S.
This ministry is here to provide counseling, awareness, and ministering to pregnant women who may or may not be considering abortion. This message really impacted me. ((I cried the whole service)). I remember being pregnant, scared, and uncertain of what was going on inside of me. I remember finding out that something was wrong with my baby. I remember Ryan's tears, raw emotions, and the punching of steering wheels in anger and confusion. I also remember saying no to an amniocentesis. I remember being asked if abortion was an option.
Does THIS child look like she needed to be aborted??????!!!! Why did I even have that choice???! I thank God for us choosing to keep her. She is such a ball of light in this dark world to all of us!
Back to me (bawling in pew). I heard the Lord say, "THIS is where you need to be.". I need to be there for these lost, confused, and scared women to show them and tell them that there is different way! The doctors aren't the ones who know what their babies are capable of! "But there is a God in Heaven.." Who does!!
Father God, please forgive of the opportunities that you lay out for me that I do not always cease. Help me to be Your hands and feet so that I can bring honor to Your name. I love you. Amen.